“How to Move Forward When You’re Stuck in Grief or Life “

“I often felt in those days that to be stuck in grief was to feel kidnapped against one’s will and forced to go to some foreign country, all the while just longing to go back home.”

– Marie Mutsuki Mockett

Have you found yourself feeling stuck — unsure how to move forward in your work, your relationships, or even within your own heart? Maybe it’s not just indecision or burnout. Maybe you’re carrying the quiet weight of grief — from a loss, a life change, or something that never got the closure it needed. If that sounds familiar, here’s a powerful question to ask yourself: What have I been focusing on?

The answer might surprise you.

When we’re stuck — especially in grief — our thoughts often circle around what’s missing, what’s broken, or how life hasn’t gone the way we hoped. This isn’t weakness. It’s a very human response to pain. But if your mind is consumed with what’s gone wrong or how much you've lost, it’s easy to feel trapped there. Grief has a way of narrowing our view, blurring out the parts of life that still hold meaning.

But there's another path, one that begins not by dismissing your pain, but by shifting your focus — gently, intentionally — toward what’s still possible.

Instead of only seeing the losses, start noticing the small openings: a chance to speak your truth, reconnect with someone, find beauty in something simple, or give yourself permission to feel joy without guilt. These small acts can spark momentum.

A Gentle Practice for Reclaiming Possibility:

1. Begin by honoring your gifts.
Take a moment to write down everything you’re good at — no matter how big or small. Think beyond the obvious: maybe you're a natural listener, a problem-solver, a warm hugger, a great cook, someone who can calm chaos, or spark laughter. Let the list be playful and true — from navigating spreadsheets to nurturing others, from sharing ideas to climbing trees.

2. Now — let it go.
Yes, really. Set the list aside. You made it to remind yourself: you are capable, you are creative, and you are full of potential. But now it’s time to move beyond analysis. This is where your deeper wisdom comes in. By stepping away from your logical mind, you create room for inspiration to rise in fresh, surprising ways — ways you can’t "figure out," only feel into.

3. Create space — literally and mentally.
Sit in stillness for a few minutes each day. Picture a doorway opening — at your heart or your forehead — and imagine light or energy flowing in. If it helps, imagine yourself floating in space, unattached to expectations or labels. Feel your heart soften. Allow your breath to steady. This is your opening to the field of possibility — where you don’t have to know anything, just be present and willing.

4. Wait, listen, and receive.
Stay in this space until you feel calm and grounded. You are making room for new ideas, nudges, and direction to arrive — not by force, but by invitation. Don’t chase clarity; trust that it will come. Over time, the next step will feel clear. Maybe it's reaching out to someone. Taking a leap. Exploring something new. Or letting something old fall away. Sometimes clarity shows up as a whisper. Other times, it bursts in unexpectedly. Either way, you’ll know.

5. Daydream with purpose.
Imagine doing that which actually lights you up — something meaningful, exciting, or even just fun. Let the picture form without worrying about how it could happen. Feel the joy, the flow, the freedom. Even five minutes of this kind of imagining can begin to shift your energy. The more often you visualize, the more real and grounded that possibility becomes. Let it energize you — not pressure you.

6. Say thank you — and move on with your day.
Once you’ve visualized and grounded, release it. Come back to what’s in front of you. Do the dishes. Answer the email. Take care of your body. Try not to complain, compare, or dwell in negativity — that energy clouds the clarity you’ve just created. Stay open, curious, and grateful.

7. Return to this practice daily.
These small steps — noticing, imagining, grounding, and thanking — will begin to build momentum. If something calls to you, try it. If an idea won’t leave you alone, explore it. You don’t need to know the whole plan. Just respond to the next right nudge. And remember: it’s often when we’re most willing to surrender that the most unexpected, beautiful doors begin to open.

So how do you begin to get unstuck?

Start where you are. Maybe it’s reaching out to someone. Taking a walk. Writing a few words. Volunteering. Laughing. Exploring a long-lost interest. These aren’t solutions — they’re invitations. Even while carrying grief, you’re allowed to feel alive again. Often, the biggest limitation isn’t your loss, but the belief that it’s not okay to move forward.

But it is. And you can — one gentle, courageous step at a time.

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